God does my life suck sometimes...
- Thread starter mofaster
- Start date
sorry for your losses. I know from personal experience what its like to lose a loved one. All i can say is take life 1 day at a time. Maybe "THE BIG BIKER" in the sky has other plans for you.just remember you are never alone, always can come here and vent or just blow off alittle steam . Sometimes it helps to know other people are around that will listen.
I'm so sorry. I know there is nothing more painful than heartbreak. My thoughts and Prayers are with you. Venting is good. So is surrounding yourself with friends and loved ones and keeping busy.
Sending you a virtual hug
Sending you a virtual hug
mastiffdave
Well-Known Member
Sometimes Life looks a little dark but remember the storm is always darkest before the calm appears again. What ever comes your way , you have friends here who care. Prayers for you.
ChrisK1969
Member
Hey man I feel sorry for you and feel your pain. My father died at a young age due to a heart attack and my mother committed suicide back in 2002. I know heart ache. All I can say is that things get better with time. You truly never forget, but time does heal a little bit. Hope you meet someone nice soon.
Ray
Well-Known Member
Sorry for your loss buddy,,,and it is perfectly ok to vent and let it all out,,, When I read about Kelly a little while ago before the ride,,, & I am not a sissy either but I don't mind saying it brought tears to my eyes,, wish I could have been there for the ride too but not possible. I used to vent a lot in the wrong ways at times if I can say this on here without making myself look bad,, I usually made a total azz of myself.
By the grace of God in my older years I vent calmly and try to keep myself busy working on something trying to sort things out before I open my mouth or do something and revert back to the total azz thing when I used to just go off instantly. There are things that happen in life to everyone that we really have no control over, I was a control freak too. Not so much anymore, just try to do the best I can with the things I have a little control over, and everyday thank God for getting me through another day.
This will make you laugh at where I found a great "vent" for myself,,, but I get started and can't get away from it... I wax and polish our vechicles and of course the scooter,,,to the point I wipe it down with silver polish.
We were at a MDA ride today and they had a bike show which of course I would have won if I had rode in the rain,, I assure you it was shining,, it was also pouring straight down this morning. I drove my truck payed my registration fee bought a tee shirt..They rode in the rain and had the bike show later,,, a friend of mine was wiping his harley down,,, I watched him for a few minutes,, asked for a rag , just one!!!! I finally got hte rag and sit down on the ground and started phycoticly detailing it the best I could with just one rag....
,,he finaly left when he saw I was not going to give him the rag back,,,,
Ray
Someone gave me this a long time ago,, it helped me and I hope it can comfort you as well,,
Serinity Prayer
God,
Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.
By the grace of God in my older years I vent calmly and try to keep myself busy working on something trying to sort things out before I open my mouth or do something and revert back to the total azz thing when I used to just go off instantly. There are things that happen in life to everyone that we really have no control over, I was a control freak too. Not so much anymore, just try to do the best I can with the things I have a little control over, and everyday thank God for getting me through another day.
This will make you laugh at where I found a great "vent" for myself,,, but I get started and can't get away from it... I wax and polish our vechicles and of course the scooter,,,to the point I wipe it down with silver polish.
We were at a MDA ride today and they had a bike show which of course I would have won if I had rode in the rain,, I assure you it was shining,, it was also pouring straight down this morning. I drove my truck payed my registration fee bought a tee shirt..They rode in the rain and had the bike show later,,, a friend of mine was wiping his harley down,,, I watched him for a few minutes,, asked for a rag , just one!!!! I finally got hte rag and sit down on the ground and started phycoticly detailing it the best I could with just one rag....
,,he finaly left when he saw I was not going to give him the rag back,,,,Ray
Someone gave me this a long time ago,, it helped me and I hope it can comfort you as well,,
Serinity Prayer
God,
Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.
Bobby Schulz
Active Member
Sorry for the loss of your loved ones.... Just remember you always have a place to vent,people here that are always going to listen, and you have a big dog so you wont be single long :up:
:up:
outdoorsman26
Well-Known Member
I hear ya bro!!! but a wise man once told me.... No matter how bad you think you have it there is ALLWAYS sum son-of-a-bitch that has it WAY worse than you!!!!
I hope things turn around for ya!!!!
I hope things turn around for ya!!!!
mofaster
Member
Thank you all so very very much, what a wonderful group of individuals, that I am proud to be associated with. Many times, if you put something like this up, you would get nothing but, "Don't be a wuss" "Get over it", etc, but you all have showed nothing but compassion, and I appreciate it.
Of course losing my wife, was/is the hardest thing that I will ever have to face, I will never be the same man, different. She was, and always will be the love of my life.
Coming out of the fog, I did meet someone wonderful, and who thought I was the most amazing man they had ever meet. We fell, which was an unbelievable thing to imagine for me. I realize a lot of it was just being so vulnerable, raw, but I felt alive again, and somewhat normal. She was wonderful and beautiful, and I thought wow, Kelli is working here to see me smile again.
But, her situation (being separated) and with a hub that was very insecure and would do anything to have her back, hit all the right guilt buttons on her, even though in the end, SHE made the decision to go back. She told me that she had never been treated so wonderfully in her life, like a princess, the way I always treated Kelli. But, the guilt and fear of final divorce, was more powerful than the love she had for me. We did the back and forth thing for a while, but we had such a hard time letting go of each other. Even after having him move back home, We still were seeing each other (I know Jerry Springer shit), but my heart wanted what it wanted. She went home, I came home to an empty house and a broken heart...every time. I'm a dumb ass, I put myself here, and I don't think I would of ever done this before Kelli's death, but I'm a weak man right now I guess.
Life is funny too, ironic, I have several women who are very interested in spending time with me, but I don't have those feeling for them, yet the one I want to spend time with, no longer wants that (in her heart yes, but she is to conflicted). I have so many people say, you are an "amazing catch", but it doesn't mean shit right now, because I have given this person so much power.
Then I say, "Why God" did you take my angel, if she was here, I wouldn't be dealing with any of this, but, I guess its like trying to teach calculus to a grasshopper, there are somethings we will never understand or make sense of in this life.
That is a lot of personal shit to throw out there, but, at this point, I have nothing but humility...
Thanks for letting me vent..
Of course losing my wife, was/is the hardest thing that I will ever have to face, I will never be the same man, different. She was, and always will be the love of my life.
Coming out of the fog, I did meet someone wonderful, and who thought I was the most amazing man they had ever meet. We fell, which was an unbelievable thing to imagine for me. I realize a lot of it was just being so vulnerable, raw, but I felt alive again, and somewhat normal. She was wonderful and beautiful, and I thought wow, Kelli is working here to see me smile again.
But, her situation (being separated) and with a hub that was very insecure and would do anything to have her back, hit all the right guilt buttons on her, even though in the end, SHE made the decision to go back. She told me that she had never been treated so wonderfully in her life, like a princess, the way I always treated Kelli. But, the guilt and fear of final divorce, was more powerful than the love she had for me. We did the back and forth thing for a while, but we had such a hard time letting go of each other. Even after having him move back home, We still were seeing each other (I know Jerry Springer shit), but my heart wanted what it wanted. She went home, I came home to an empty house and a broken heart...every time. I'm a dumb ass, I put myself here, and I don't think I would of ever done this before Kelli's death, but I'm a weak man right now I guess.
Life is funny too, ironic, I have several women who are very interested in spending time with me, but I don't have those feeling for them, yet the one I want to spend time with, no longer wants that (in her heart yes, but she is to conflicted). I have so many people say, you are an "amazing catch", but it doesn't mean shit right now, because I have given this person so much power.
Then I say, "Why God" did you take my angel, if she was here, I wouldn't be dealing with any of this, but, I guess its like trying to teach calculus to a grasshopper, there are somethings we will never understand or make sense of in this life.
That is a lot of personal shit to throw out there, but, at this point, I have nothing but humility...
Thanks for letting me vent..
Tim
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I think we all have been in your shoes at one time or another, and time does heal the wounds. It doesn't take it all away, but makes it bearable again. Sometimes it's really hard to remember this when you are hurting... so I'm reminding you. :up:
Take time for yourself and I'm sure another angel will make her way to you.
Take time for yourself and I'm sure another angel will make her way to you.
mofaster
Member
Thanks Tim, I appreciate the words. Let me know when you're in town, so we can get that drink...
BDMCHOPPERFREAK
Member
My thoughts and prayers...
My thoughts and prayers are with you brother.
My thoughts and prayers are with you brother.
K9Anniv
Well-Known Member
Went through a similar scenario 3 years ago brother, losing my dear wife to cancer.
She was only 48 years old, and I wrestled with trying to understand 'why' for a long time before I turned it over to God and accepted "Thy will be done..".
It still hurts though, and there's hardly a minute goes by that I don't think of her and miss her.
So even though we travel different paths, I empathize with you and pray that God will ease your pain and hold you up going forward.
Keep the faith, and God bless...
She was only 48 years old, and I wrestled with trying to understand 'why' for a long time before I turned it over to God and accepted "Thy will be done..".
It still hurts though, and there's hardly a minute goes by that I don't think of her and miss her.
So even though we travel different paths, I empathize with you and pray that God will ease your pain and hold you up going forward.
Keep the faith, and God bless...
2004BC
FREEDOM!!!
Don't be a wuss and get over it!!!
You know I'm kidding, right? Anybody who writes "It's like trying to teach calculus to a grasshopper" has to have a sense of humor despite the situation. I'm glad you had the guts to post your thoughts here. Says a lot about you and the specialness of this forum and the character of the people on it. I actually care about you and what you're sharing and I generally don't give a shit about anything.
Hang in there and, as said before, take life one day at a time. You never know what's around the next corner. Keep the faith!!!
You know I'm kidding, right? Anybody who writes "It's like trying to teach calculus to a grasshopper" has to have a sense of humor despite the situation. I'm glad you had the guts to post your thoughts here. Says a lot about you and the specialness of this forum and the character of the people on it. I actually care about you and what you're sharing and I generally don't give a shit about anything.
Hang in there and, as said before, take life one day at a time. You never know what's around the next corner. Keep the faith!!!
Jazzy
Active Member
Hang in then, one day at a time, (sometimes its an hour at a time). I'm not a religious person but do believe that there is a plan. I certainly don't understand it but gotta have faith in something.
Next thought is at least you've experienced some great love in your life...some never find it.
Last thought - good things come to good people.
Next thought is at least you've experienced some great love in your life...some never find it.
Last thought - good things come to good people.
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Get out there and "Smell some Roses"! There are so many beatiful things in this great country and in this life. Maybe you don't have to fill that personal relationship void so soon after such tragedy. Search inside yourself for happiness for a while.
Just trying to help.
Shovelcowboy
Just trying to help.
Shovelcowboy
erldawg
Guru
Well put Ken :up: Happiness comes from within..:up:
take time to get re-acquainted with yourself before you try to get to know somebody else.